Friday, July 30, 2010

What's On the SWEDA Menu?


Alright, it’s time to make ye olde sales pitch once more.

But first, some background information that you’ve all been waiting for.

SWEDA is currently an all-male private forum, consisting of two groups. The first group is the group to which I belong, of which none of the original members (not even my Wife) are still part. There are four other men in this group.

This group was once made up of the original Argonauts: Cary, Steve W., Ezra, Keith Z., Julian, and myself, as well as Nick (Ascension) and Alginojr, who (along with Keith, and two women, who left early on, though eventually came back) were at SWEDA in the very early, pre-ARGO days, before the group was named as Thessaly. Thessaly also included my Wife, Lucinda, and the mysterious Wangwei.

Cary, Julian, and Steve left this group at different times for different reasons. Ezra “graduated” when he grokked that the letting go process of SWEDA inevitably culminated in letting go of his attachments to SWEDA itself. Because of this, Ezra became the first (imaginary) “graduate.”

There are no SWEDA “graduates,” per se, because it's not a school system and there’s no actual “end” to the deconstruction process. Well, there is; but you won’t be there to receive your diploma.

A few months back, another group formed, Lemnos, which went through a similarly rocky development, until a time when what was left of Lemnos was taken into Thessaly. This coincided with a new group forming (recently named Doliones), made up of the successful Try-Outs at Anomalies Anonymous (AA), the “no-charge” area of the (still private) forum. (The AA is no longer operational.)

Still following me so far?

The remaining members of Lemnos, having kept up the SWEDA grind for several months, were then “upgraded” into Thessaly, expanding the ranks considerably. Soon after this, four of the core members of Thessaly left, reducing the ranks once again. Bizarrely, each time this happened, new arrivals also showed up at the exact time: men go out, men come in. This was timed not only to the day, but sometimes to the hour.

This indicates that SWEDA functions as a living consciousness system. As with an organism, whenever cells “die,” they are immediately replaced.

Like all organisms, it wishes to grow.

For the past year, the size of SWEDA has remained fairly constant, varying between perhaps a minimum of five and a maximum of 17 members, but keeping to an consistent average of about 10 or 12.

Its current size (following the most recent shift, pertaining to a woman’s group which lasted all of two weeks, and which I talk about on today's Vagabond Blues podcast) is ten: five inside Thessaly, and six in the new group. There is one member who belongs to both groups, so in this case, five plus six = ten.

Members of Thessaly can read and interact with the threads of the second group, Doliones, but not vice versa. The nominal leader of the second group has access to Thessaly. This is about to change, however, as I intend to allow the more long-standing members of Doliones read-only access to Thessaly. Today, in fact.

Having summed all that up, hopefully I have satisfied your curiosity enough to make you more curious than before.

As posted below, I recently decided to focus more on voice consultations, and less on text. These Skyped consultations usually run a little over an hour in length, and are recorded for the group to listen to.
With the co-operation of the group, we will be making some of these consultations public in the near future, depending on both parties’ agreements, and with the input of other group members as to which talks will make the best podcasts. This way, SWEDA can begin to extend into the public realm and become more of an open project. I began motion this with Warty Theorems, but those podcasts were done as podcasts. This will be private consultations that are then aired, if and when it’s agreed to do so. (Possibly with some editing.)

Now to brass tacks.

Signing up for SWEDA will cost you $100 for the first month. This price includes two talks with myself, that's Aeolus (consults which may or may not become podcasts), and a month of interaction at the forum with the other group members. There is no obligation to stay past the first month.

Because of this, you will not belong to either of the groups, but be in a sort of trial space where the other two groups can read and respond to your posts, even though you can’t see anything going on in their space. (A space filled up with months of soul-searching and personal disclosures.) Whether you are part of a small group of first-timers or not will depend on how many others sign up during a given month. If you choose to sign up and don't want to be doing it alone, then you can simply wait until a small group is assembled, however long that takes.

So for those who want to find out what really goes on inside the mysterious labyrinth of unbecoming that is the Stormy Weather Existential Detective Agency, you can do so now, for the cost of five trips to the grocery store, half a dozen trips to the movies, ten bottles of beer, 20 packs of smokes, or half an hour with a medium-rate hooker.

For more of what SWEDA entails, see here.

Sign up here.

Thursday, July 15, 2010

The Dis-Enmeshment Chamber


"Enmeshment refers to an extreme form of proximity and intensity in family interactions...In a highly enmeshed, over-involved family, changes within one family member or in the relationship between two family members reverberate throughout the system... On an individual level, interpersonal differentiation in an enmeshed system is poor...in enmeshed families the individual gets lost in the system. The boundaries that define individual autonomy are so weak that functioning in individually differentiated ways is radically handicapped.

"We're enmeshed when we use an individual for our identity, sense of value, worth, well-being, safety, purpose, and security. Instead of two people present, we become one identity. More simply, enmeshment is present when our sense of wholeness comes from another person.

We hear enmeshment phrases everyday such as, "I'd die without you," "You're my everything," "Without you, I'm nothing," "I need you," or "You make me whole." Many of us find our identity and self-worth by becoming the mate, parent, or friend of a successful and/or prestigious individual, or we find the need to fix and caretake individuals to give us a sense of purpose.

Enmeshment doesn't allow for individuality, wholeness, personal empowerment, healthy relationships with ourselves or others, and, most importantly, a relationship with our Higher Power."


Someone at SWEDA recently complained that they couldn’t see the difference between friendship and enmeshment.

I replied that there really wasn't a difference, not in our present culture.

Here’s why.

Our patterned wants and needs are laid down in those first few years of life. We carry them with us wherever we go. In every single interaction, in every relationship, we are unconsciously driven to seek what we didn't get in childhood, or to help alleviate the pain of not getting it, and we will use the other person in any way we can. Ordinary friendship, then, is always based on a secret agreement to service the wants and needs of the other person, in return for the same treatment: "You ease my pain, I'll ease yours."

The problem is that pain relief never addresses the source of the pain itself, any more than alcohol heals emotional trauma: it just blocks it out of awareness. And since the source of the pain is buried deep in the past, all our attempts to get what we want from friendship and love relationships in the present invariably fail. Because no matter how much the other person gives us what we want, it won't heal that wound. We are the only ones who can do that.

SWEDA potentially allows for real friendship, or true alliance, to bloom, because it provides a space within which everyone is continuously looking out for their patterns of enmeshment and everyone else's, and in which no secret agreement stays secret for long.

Learning how not to enmesh takes years, however. We've spent most of our lives believing that enmeshment is the normal way of things, that it is what real friendship is made of. So to have a space in which all our interactions are clearly separate from our other relationships allows us to become more and more aware of the difference between true friendship and enmeshment. Ideally, what we learn daily in SWEDA, we can take into our "real-world" relationships, just as we bring those experiences back into SWEDA to look for patterns and distortions. So the two realms inform one another ~ but do not overlap.

For any of us to confuse what we are doing at SWEDA with ordinary friendship, or to pursue ordinary relationships with sweda folk outside the group, is going to blur that distinction, and hence undermine the whole purpose of being at SWEDA.

Four of the men closest to me have left the group in the last month or so, and so I have been becoming increasingly aware of my own enmeshment at SWEDA.

While undergoing the dis-enmeshment process, as I am, the tendency is to try and enmesh again, just as a baby grabs for the mother’s breast when it is being taken away. The challenge is to inhibit that fear-pain reaction, and just stay in the feelings.

The predominant feeling is one of being alienated.

I am beginning to see how enmeshment is a reaction against alienation.

Alienation is the result of the constructed identity, which keeps us as awareness from connecting to and experiencing our being, or from being in our knowing.

So then we are driven by the wants and needs of the constructed identity, which is all about likes and dislikes, securing the one and keeping at bay the other. This is the basis of enmeshment: relationships based on wants and needs.

When we are disconnected, we are constantly looking for a surrogate sense of connection and belonging, a surrogate womb. The way we create that surrogate womb is by enmeshing with others. Then it is like we have these threads ~ literally energetic threads of our being ~ that are constantly supporting us, when in actual fact they are entangling us, imprisoning us. But for our person it is safe, comfortable, because it feels like we are not alone.

We allow people to put their threads, their psychic matter, into us, and we do the same to them, because this is a surrogate for a real connection, for real union, community, communion, things which the constructed identity cannot allow for, ever.

As I begin to dis-enmesh, it’s like coming out of the womb, and feeling more and more separate and alone. It’s a terrible feeling.

This is the great paradox of SWEDA. It was created as a ritual space to dis-enmesh within, but my person was also looking for a way to feel at home and connected. So I tricked myself: I was unconsciously creating this space where I thought I could get what I wanted, but now it’s come into form, I see that I can't, because to go after what I want would be to compromise the space, to make it smaller and smaller, until everybody left and there was nothing but me, alone with my enmeshment.

It’s been a year since SWEDA started and we have recently completed a cycle. I know what it is now, and I know what it is that I am doing. It’s a business, a job, a project that has a very specific purpose. That purpose is dis-enmeshing. It's a dis-enmeshment chamber.

At SWEDA, I've been getting to fine-tune my awareness of exactly how I enmesh with the people in the group, by liking or disliking them, and by getting them to like or dislike me. There’s a feeling of security and power for my person that comes from having the power to make people like me or dislike me.

I enjoy everything I do at SWEDA, but I particularly enjoy making people feel good about themselves, because then I know they are going to like me more. The flip side of this, is that I also enjoy, in a darker way, pointing out people’s dishonesty and making them uncomfortable, knowing they are going to dislike that, and even dislike me. Presumably, this has to do with having control over the way people perceive me, and although this is necessary for what I do, the danger of this control is that my person can use it to get what it wants. As soon as I am trying to get a little something for myself, enmeshment begins.

This is natural and inevitable, however. There’s no way to combat enmeshment without seeing the process of enmeshment for what it is. This means seeing it happening in the present, not just finding evidence of it having happened in the past. We are at SWEDA to enmesh, as well as to dis-enmesh, at least to a degree. It would be unrealistic to think there wouldn’t be any enmeshment at all, because our persons are invested in being liked, and as such, that is all they really know how to do.

So then SWEDA isn’t about trying to kick bad habits, but just to own up to them and really see them for what they are, and just how pervasive they are in our lives. That seeing gradually allows a new awareness to dawn, because the part of us that sees our compulsive behavior as what it is, has a separate existence to the part that is being driven to act in these ways.

Put more simply: only when we become aware of the ways in which we are acting unconsciously, can we begin to act with consciousness.

The goal of SWEDA is to recognize ourselves as we are: spheres of consciousness-being, on our way to individuated existence, free from enmeshment ~ stars. A cool, clean, true existence. Paradoxically, in this solar isolation and in complete freedom from any personal interest in others, we are free to fuse into a collective experience, bound together by perfect indifference and deepest affection. And so what seems like isolation to the person, is the ultimate togetherness for our beings.

For free one-week SWEDA Try-Out, fill out the form here.

Tuesday, July 06, 2010

JK & JDR, The Movie

My talk with JDR is now available as a download at his site, here.

Friday, July 02, 2010

Seeing the Dandy Off to the Underworld










Aeolus and mother watch on as the whores of Babylon pose before the sacrificed dandy.

Monday, June 21, 2010

More Notes from SWEDA

SWEDA's a not-doing. Not-doings center around acting for something besides personal gain.

Not-doings are acts that we can't have strong feelings about, that we can't invest in, emotionally or otherwise. That's what makes them not-doings, and why they allow us to experience ourselves outside the constructed identity, with its carrot-whip agenda, as neutral, impersonal awareness.

Not-doings are things to do simply because we can ~ and because we know that, since in the light of our pending death, nothing is really "worth" doing, we may as well do something. It is the start of controlled folly.

A "pure" not-doing has no result at all, however, such as moving rocks around in a garden then trying to remember where they were and place them back in the exact same positions. It is pointless, and the only "reward" is that, because we can't think about what we are doing (it makes no sense), it calms down the internal dialogue and we experience a freer, more childlike expression of our being.

One problem people have with sweda, or with the people there, isn't that they aren't being straight about their incapacity to be straight; it's that they aren't enjoying expressing their twisty lack of straightness enough. They feel bored because they are used to only acting when there's something in it for them, some sort of perk. There are no perks at sweda.

Beyond the boredom and despair of constant self-immersion, of dwelling endlessly on our personal self, is the delight of acting and living for the sheer hell of it.

At SWEDA, you get to talk about yourself all day long with an audience of sorcerers!

What more could you possibly want out of life?? ;)

***

Being a man is like being a ghost. Living with death always at arm's length, just one touch away.

Living for nothing, yet with the abundance that comes through us when we are emptied of all our wants and needs.

***


Going finer.

The greater the noise, the harder it is to find a signal in that noise. But the deeper and more information-rich that signal will be if we do find it.

JDR talks about how it's easy to smell a flower and tune into the essence-of-being within that flower. He compares that with breathing in fumes, and tuning into the essence of being within those fumes. Point is, it is the same essence, the same being, but it's a lot harder to tune into it with fumes, than with the flower.

Going finer means being willing to drop beneath the surface and find what's of value even in the coarsest or most uncomfortable of situations. It's ignoring the gorgeous hard-bodied babe at the bar to talk to the geeky girl with pimples, because you sense that she has something to offer beyond boobs and lips. And then, by connecting to the geeky girl, experiencing a kind of attraction much softer, subtler, and richer because it wasn't immediately apparent.

It means being in an uncomfortable situation and, instead of trying to get out of it or change it to make ourselves more comfortable, just being in it as-it-is, and seeing what is actually on offer. What happens then is that we find a place within ourselves that is comfortable in the midst of our discomfort, and then we realize that we don't need all those surface elements to be comfortable, or turned on, or happy, or whatever, because we have all that within ourselves. We have the capacity to find a signal of truth in any amount of noise, of lies or ugliness or pollution or discomfort, or whatever we are surrounded by.

In simple terms, it is settling for less. And the less we settle for, the more we find.

Monday, June 14, 2010

The Soft Warrior

Here's a transcript of JDR from the last evening we were in Amsterdam. This is the one during which I felt John was talking directly to myself, as I had added my intent to the question. (Yes, John: tell me about rage!)

I also came to see it as a delayed response to my previously unanswered question, during our own talk, "Am I still a warrior?"

The answer is, "Yes. But a soft warrior!"

(I just found out that my own talk with JDR is going to available as a video download soon, BTW.)

Man: I am moving into the void, experiencing love and a lot of rage at the same time. I see my awareness of the external shifting simultaneously. I lose capacity to formulate.

John: Your heart is entreat-able. Where there is love your heart is entreated and in your heart you open and you respond. It’s your Will that you are identified with

Your Will is also entreat-able, but it is only entreat-able by love. When love touches your Will, you recognize it in your heart and your Will opens, but when something other than love touches your Will, in your Will, you close and you do that which you are able to do…and that is push.

In knowing that in your heart and in your Will you are entreat-able but only by love, then incline your heart to that despite anything else that touches your Will. That for you then is the surrender of your own Will to That that touches your heart the most. You won’t have the advantage in your person of ‘push’ any more. You won’t have the satisfaction in your person of ‘push’ any more. What you will have, even in your person, is a delicate pull of being touched in your heart. This will cost you in your self everything that you have acquired in your self in being able to push and in having pushed. You’ll be turning into, throughout your self, a delicate willingness of heart that will come up first in your Will.

Underlying all of the rage is that you want to ‘do’. There’s the openness to do, but as soon as you move to do, you move in a Will that is conditioned to how you’ve made your self, and in that is a real frustration because in openness to do and the willingness to do the wrong thing keeps happening, so then you do what you can…and that is push.

Follow-through to the actual openness, within, the openness to do, even if you don’t know how to do. Hold that openness to do within the softness of your heart and you’ll know from within that a very little bit of how to do, because you’ll already in your heart be being that. That beingness coming into your Will, coming into your capacity as a person to do, will move with an openness and a kind of softness, even in your Will, that you’ve not been accustomed to.

Look for such really Little-Bits that you already know in your heart and you’ll not be frustrated in your Will with little bits of movement. Those little bits of movement in your Will will be very much touching your heart. You will love the delicate process in that. You will love the softening in that. You’ll love the real nurture in that. Your self will soften as your heart does. As that becomes your way, the way of your heart in your self, your person will soften and you’ll love the nurture of that. You will love the delicateness of that in your person.

The rage comes from your trying to make too big of a jump at once, and you’ll be skipping over the delicacies in your heart that do make a real step in your Will, work. Follow-through with the Little-Bits, look for the really Little-Bits, and you’ll be overcome with ‘pull’ in your heart instead of ‘push’ in your Will. As you begin to do this and you experience the hardness of your own Will open and soften, you’ll be filled with joy at the delicacy of that. As soon as you see it work, your heart will be won by that.

When you see it begin to work, you’ll have the innocence of glee in your heart, just like that in a lovely, lovely little boy. You’ll know the same, but as a man. Living by that will make you a lovely, lovely man. In your Will make no really big steps or you’ll be reverting in your Will to using what you can…and that is ‘push’. Relate to the Tiny-Little-Bits in your Will that touch your heart, and you’ll then be moving as that in your Will, opening and softening in your Will in ways that affect your self and your person. You’ll see the Tiny-Little-Bits of progress, the kind of progress that fills your heart.

Stay close to it and you’ll not fall away from it.

Wednesday, June 09, 2010

The Art of Unliving

I've asked current SWEDANs to come up with advertising pitches for the process. Here's the first, from Steve "Hail." I'd like to see someone top this.

I lost all my friends, all my money, and all my aspirations on the ARGO-plan diet!

People keep coming up and saying "Shit man, you look awful! What happened to you?"

I tell them it's all thanks to new formula SWEDA! Say goodbye to your old personality and say "Hello!" to a brand-new you TODAY! Stop living and start dying!"


Before:



After:

Friday, June 04, 2010

Would You Pay Good Money to be Unplugged?


I have invented a service (SWEDA) for others that is difficult to identify the benefits of without first experiencing it. Since, ostensibly, all it entails is interaction via forum and skype ~ WORDS ~ the initial assumption seems to be that this is something that ought to be free. It's not costing me anything (besides my time), after all, and the Internet is all about the free traffic of information. Even the fact that I have started a private forum pushes a lot of peoples buttons. That's just what I am up against: consensus reality, and specifically, that pocket of CR that has formed a new consensus about how to break the old consensus, complete with rules and assumptions about how private forums are elitist, and so on (the 2nd matrix).

But this is all besides the point, regarding why so many people react with suspicion, and even hostility, to my charging to provide an existential detection service.

The penny finally dropped after talking to Joe. It's really very simple: I enjoy what I do.

This fact communicates to my audience. How could it not? Enjoyment is unmistakable. My audience (that's you), then, sees that I enjoy doing what I do, and they hear me asking for money to carry on doing it. The conscious question people are asking is: "Why should I pay for something when I don't know what I'm getting?" But, underneath that, the real question (I now suspect) is: "Why should I pay this guy to do something he obviously likes doing?"

We are programmed from very early on to accept that whatever we do to earn a living will not be for our enjoyment. It will be from sheer necessity. We learn to accept this "reality," and to compromise our natures and our desires so as to submit to society's decree. In order to live within the system, we have to become slaves to that system, and wind up doing things that we really don't want to do in order to have the money to do the things we do want to do. That's "reality." Right?

But what if someone did exactly what they wanted to be doing, what they most enjoyed, and got paid for it? Within the frame of reference of our social mandates, this is anathema, unthinkable, a fantasy. What's more, it is an affront to all those hard-working people who have sacrificed their time and compromised their beings in order to get along. It's insulting!

If I'm right, the reason people question me for charging money for what I do is less about their doubting the value of what I am doing, and more to do with an unconscious resentment that someone might actually be able to earn a living doing what they love. People are thinking to themselves: "I have to work for a living; why shouldn't he?"

(Sure, there are people who enjoy their work; but there's still the assumption that they wouldn't be doing it if they didn't have to, and that they just learned to enjoy it by getting good at it. And even these people are fairly exceptional, and probably especially in my audience, which seems to consist of a lot of slackers who, like me, are trying to avoid work altogether.)

The irony of this is that, in work as much as sex, enjoyment is above all what improves our performance at it. The more I enjoy what I do, the better I am at doing it, and vice versa. Enjoyment is the essential factor in anything we do, most of all what we do "for a living."

What I do for a living is to facilitate awakening, by enhancing individuals' intelligence and self-awareness. In a nut-shell.

But beyond the content, there is also the form. What I am doing with SWEDA is pioneer work. It's never been attempted before. It is opening up new possibilities, not only for myself and for anyone who comes aboard, but also for anyone out there who is paying close attention.

People don't like that. To see new possibilities means to question the validity of the old possibilities, to recognize them as limited and limiting, and worse, to see themselves that way too: limited and limiting.

So if what I do fails, you can tell yourselves that you had it right all along. Nothing to worry about here. You're living as wage-slaves because, hell, that's the only choice we got, right? But if it succeeds, then you get to question all that time and energy you've been putting into drudgery. Because you too could have tried something entirely new, taken that chance, and also succeeded. That would really suck, right?

If I'm right about this, many of you out their are unconsciously invested in seeing me fail, because you are consciously invested in the old way of doing (and seeing) things. It's the way that says enjoyment and necessity have nothing to do with each other. It's the way you tell yourselves that, first you need to do what's necessary, and then, once that's done, and your future is secured, then you get to enjoy your "down-time." Doing what you love is all very well, but first you have to do what you hate. That's the program. And if you don't hate what you're doing, you aren't doing it right.

Me, I don't have much leisure time at all. Couple of hours in the evening watching Lost & Mad Men. But then, I enjoy my work day so much it sometimes goes on into the night. There are days when I don't facilitate anyone's awakening, but that's not by choice. I'm not doing this for money. I'm doing it for love of being. Which is exactly why I get paid for doing it.

This is a new way of doing business. Those who support me now, will be investing in that new way, and I suspect, they will find themselves supported by it further on down the line. I may even be paying your wages some day. ; )

On the other hand, I could fail. That's okay too. Which way it goes, is largely up to you.

How's that for an awesome response-ability?

Wednesday, June 02, 2010

SWEDA 101

To act out patterns usually feels good. We give our patterns what they want and so we feel like we are getting what we want: such as when we act in anger and get the other person to pay attention and listen to us.

Enmeshment is very simple: the actions of another cause certain feelings in us which we find unpleasant. We then react, either by overt provocation and confrontation, or by "withholding," withdrawing emotionally (sulking) and so controlling the other through creating distance. The aim is to generate feelings in the other that match our own.

This happens when honest and open communication breaks down, for whatever reason (usually our own fear of vulnerability and exposure).

Simply put, if we feel angry about what another does to us, instead of either taking the anger away and processing it alone, or communicating the anger to the other openly and softly, we try to provoke anger in the other so that they feel the same way we do. We have then "communicated" our feelings to the other, in the least honest (yet also most "direct") fashion. This is also known as "off-loading."

Letting our patterns control us means we get the "feel-good" of indignation or self-pity; but instead of being driven by patterns (which is like the donkey trying to escape the whip), we can give in to them without acting them out. That giving in causes us, as awareness, to sink deeper into the patterns, into what's beneath them. Beneath anger is usually fear of some kind; beneath self-pity a deep sorrow, and so on.

This doesn't feel good, because we are going into the very experience that our patterns were designed to take and keep us out of. But once we allow that experience, our patterns begin to dissolve: because they are no longer needed.

Monday, May 31, 2010

Thanks to All Ye Bastards

I received a pleasing response from all you bastards out there, and now most of my Paper Tigers are gone. There are about 20 copies left, so since I don't plan on doing another print-run any time soon, your chance to grab one is rapidly receding into non-existence. (A couple of years from now, however, it may be selling for $500 on ebay.)

Wednesday, May 26, 2010

Saturday, May 22, 2010

Don Juan Was An Existential Detective

Here's some excerpts from an old interview with Carlos Castaneda that pertain nicely to SWEDA. Full Interview here.

CASTANEDA: Don Juan thinks that what he calls seeing is apprehending the world without any interpretation; it is pure wondering perception. Sorcery is a means to this end. To break the certainty that the world is the way you have always been taught you must learn a new description of the world--sorcery--and then hold the old and the new together. Then you will see that neither description is final. At that moment you slip between the descriptions; you stop the world and see. You are left with wonder; the true wonder of seeing the world without interpretation.

KEEN: Do you think it is possible to get beyond interpretation by using psychedelic drugs?

CASTANEDA: I don't think so. That is my quarrel with people like Timothy Leary. I think he was improvising from within the European membership and merely rearranging old glosses. I have never taken LSD, but what I gather from don Juan's teachings is that psychotropics are used to stop the flow of ordinary interpretations, to enhance the contradictions within the glosses, and to shatter certainty. But the drugs alone do not allow you to stop the world. To do that you need an alternative description of the world. That is why don Juan had to teach me sorcery.

KEEN: There is an ordinary reality that we Western people are certain is 'the' only world, and then there is is the separate reality of the sorcerer. What are the essential differences between them?

CASTANEDA: In European membership the world is built largely from what the eyes report to the mind. In sorcery the total body is used as a perceptor. As Europeans we see a world out there and talk to ourselves about it. We are here and the world is there. Our eyes feed our reason and we have no direct knowledge of things. According to sorcery this burden on the eyes in unnecessary. We know with the total body.

KEEN: Western man begins with the assumption that subject and object are separated. We're isolated from the world and have to cross some gap to get to it. For don Juan and the tradition of sorcery, the body is already in the world. We are united with the world, not alienated from it.

CASTANEDA: That's right. Sorcery has a different theory of embodiment. The problem in sorcery is to tune and trim your body to make it a good receptor. Europeans deal with their bodies as if they were objects. We fill them with alcohol, Bad food, and anxiety. When something goes wrong we think germs have invaded the body from outside and so we import some medicine to cure it. The disease is not a part of us. Don Juan doesn't believe that. For him disease is a disharmony between a man and his world. The body is an awareness and it must be treated impeccably.

...

KEEN: Do you think don Juan lives in this state of awareness most of the time?

CASTANEDA: Yes. He lives in magical time and occasionally comes into ordinary time. I live in ordinary time and occasionally dip into magical time.

KEEN: Anyone who travels so far from the beaten paths of consensus must be very lonely.

CASTANEDA: I think so. Don Juan lives in an awesome world and he has left routine people far behind. Once when I was with don Juan and his friend don Genaro I saw the loneliness they shared and their sadness at leaving behind the trappings and points of reference of ordinary society. I think don Juan turns his loneliness into art. He contains and controls his power, the wonder and the loneliness, and turns them into art. His art is the metaphorical way in which he lives. This is why his teachings have such a dramatic flavor and unity. He deliberately constructs his life and his manner of teaching.

...

CASTANEDA: Don Juan used psychotropic plants only in the middle period of my apprenticeship because I was so stupid, sophisticated and cocky. I held on to my description of the world as if it were the only truth. Psychotropics created a gap in my system of glosses. They destroyed my dogmatic certainty. But I paid a tremendous price. When the glue that held my world together was dissolved, my body was weakened and it took months to recuperate. I was anxious and functioned at a very low level.

KEEN: Does don Juan regularly use psychotropic drugs to stop the world?

CASTANEDA: No. He can now stop it at will. He told me that for me to try to see without the aid of psychotropic plants would be useless. But if I behaved like a warrior and assumed responsibility I would not need them; they would only weaken my body.

...


KEEN: You now minimize the importance of the psychedelic experience connected with your apprenticeship. And you don't seem to go around doing the kind of tricks you describe as the sorcerer's stock-in-trade. What are the elements of don Juan's teachings that are important for you? Have you been changed by them?

CASTANEDA: For me the ideas of being a warrior and a man of knowledge, with the eventual hope of being able to stop the world and see, have been the most applicable. They have given me peace and confidence in my ability to control my life. At the time I met don Juan I had very little personal power. My life had been very erratic. I had come a long way from my birthplace in Brazil. Outwardly I was aggressive and cocky, but within I was indecisive and unsure of myself. I was always making excuses for myself. Don Juan once accused me of being a professional child because I was so full of self-pity. I felt like a leaf in the wind. Like most intellectuals, my back was against the wall. I had no place to go. I couldn't see any way of life that really excited me. I thought all I could do was make a mature adjustment to a life of boredom or find ever more complex forms of entertainment such as the use of psychedelics and pot and sexual adventures. All of this was exaggerated by my habit of introspection. I was always looking within and talking to myself. The inner dialogue seldom stopped. Don Juan turned my eyes outward and taught me to accumulate personal power.

I don't think there is any other way to live if one wants to be exuberant.

...


KEEN: In the existential tradition, discussions of responsibility usually follow discussion of death.

CASTANEDA: Then don Juan is a good existentialist. When there is no way of knowing whether I have one more minute of life. I must live as if this is my last moment. Each act is the warrior's last battle. So everything must be done impeccably. Nothing can be left pending. This idea has been very freeing for me. I am here talking to you and I may never return to Los Angeles. But that wouldn't matter because I took care of everything before I came.

KEEN: This world of death and decisiveness is a long way from psychedelic utopias in which the vision of endless time destroys the tragic quality of choice.

CASTANEDA: When death stands to your left you must create your world by a series of decisions. There are no large or small decisions, only decisions that must be made now. And there is no time for doubts or remorse. If I spend my time regretting what I did yesterday I avoid the decisions I need to make today.

...


KEEN: There seem to be many parallels between existential philosophy and don Juan's teachings. What you have said about decision and gesture suggests that don Juan, like Nietzsche or Sartre, believes that will rather than reason is the most fundamental faculty of man.

CASTANEDA: I think that is right. Let me speak for myself. What I want to do, and maybe I can accomplish it, is to take the control away from my reason. My mind has been in control all of my life and it would kill me rather than relinquish control. At one point in my apprenticeship I became profoundly depressed. I was overwhelmed with terror and gloom and thoughts about suicide. Then don Juan warned me this was one of reason's tricks to retain control. He said my reason was making my body feel that there was no meaning in life. Once my mind waged this last battle and lost, reason began to assume its proper place as a tool of the body.

KEEN: "The heart has its reasons that reason knows nothing of" and so does the rest of the body.

CASTANEDA: That is the point. The body has a will of its own. Or rather, the will is the voice of the body. That is why don Juan consistently put his teachings in dramatic form. My intellect could easily dismiss his world of sorcery as nonsense. But my body was attracted to his world and his way of life. And once the body took over, a new and healthier reign was established.

...


CASTANEDA: It has been this element of engagement in the world that has kept me following the path which don Juan showed me. There is no need to transcend the world. Everything we need to know is right in front of us, if we pay attention. If you enter a state of nonordinary reality, as you do when you use psychotropic plants, it is only to draw back from it what you need in order to see the miraculous character of ordinary reality. For me the way to live--the path with heart--is not introspection or mystical transcendence but presence in the world. This world is the warrior's hunting ground.

Wednesday, May 19, 2010

Saturday, May 15, 2010

Buy My Book You Bastards

Only four copies been sold so far. And some of you guys still think I'm a Somebody in this Town!?


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Wednesday, May 12, 2010

Monday, May 10, 2010

Friday, May 07, 2010

Monday, May 03, 2010

JK & JDR



Here's a transcript of my last exchange with john de ruiter, for those who are interested:

Jason: Hello, John. My name is Jason. We met once in London. A big part of me didn’t want to come here tonight. I think you know why. I feel like knowing you has cost me everything. But, there’s no going back, now that I do know you. So I’ve been asking myself, what do I want to ask John? Why do I want to speak to John? What does my person want here when my person knows that there’s nothing here for it. It seems like the only reason I would want to speak to you is for some sort of pain relief, even though I know that there’s not going to be any of that. So then the only other thing I can think is that I want a personal connection to you or I want to discover if there is a personal connection, if such a thing it possible, or if it matters. I had an absent father who was not present and, so there’s a big hole in my life and you were big enough to fill that hole. You have visited me in my dreams, you have taken me into your own realms, and so I feel that in a sense like I’m yours, but I know it’s not about you the person, or you the man, but a way that you embody. And I don’t know if this is leading to a question or not I’m just… Maybe I’d like if possible for you to ask a question because I feel that I trust you more than I trust myself to ask the right question, if that’s possible.

(5 minute silence)

John: You have been awakened, awakened to the profound reality within. It moves you, by your own awareness in it ~ it apprehends you. You know it’s bigger than all of the self that you’re accustomed to. More than your self, it’s more than your person and your life. You’ve been awakened to greater reality within. Once awakened to that you are also called to that. You have yet to apprehend that within that has already apprehended you. You have yet to surrender to your own deeper, real knowledge within. You see into much more than what your self is of and what your life is of. There won’t be, as you know, any rest for you until you are surrendered and completely at rest in all that within that you know the truth of. You already know that your surface existence doesn’t belong to your surface existence. It belongs to your knowing and to your seeing. This that your knowing isn’t an interesting category within yourself that you can bring into your life to add greater meaning. This that your knowing and seeing and in touch with within is what you come from. It is what you completely belong to. Everything that’s yours belongs to the same that you belong to.

Jason: I do know this. I’ve known it for a long time but knowing and understanding are not the same, and I knew it for many years but I didn’t understand it and so I tried to make it mine and I tried to make it an interesting category in my life and I tried to turn myself into The One, or the Messiah, or the Anti-Christ, pulled it down into my person and it became a great distortion, a false awakening. And now I don’t know what I’m supposed to do. It seems like I’m not supposed to do anything, but it also feels like I’m waiting for something and what I’m waiting for is, whatever words I gave it would still be completely abstract, and so whatever it is that’s most real for me is you. So then it feels like I’m waiting for you, or that I’m waiting on you, or that you’re waiting on me. I.. so again this personal, this need to make it personal. Am I waiting for something? Is there anything that I need to do?

(three minute silence)

John: This within that you’re awakened to, as you know, doesn’t come from your self. Meaning then, that your response to it isn’t going to be about your self. It’s going to be all about what you know within, this already is. It isn’t going to be about your person or your life. Your lack of understanding of what your calling within is all about doesn’t hinder your surrender to it. You don’t need further understanding for you to surrender to, belong to, enter and be this that calls you within. Understanding of what you know the truth of within doesn’t come before to be turned into it. For you to figure it out first from a distance, it will only reinforce and solidify that distance. What closes the distance within is the response in your heart to this. There is, if there is any waiting, it is the waiting of your own heart’s agreement that you know the truth of, not a mental agreement ~ a full heart agreement, a full heart surrender. Real knowledge within is all in your heart, no longer being separate from what you know the truth of with your whole heart given to real knowledge. Your own soul, with all of your heart, to be loving the implications. The implications within yourself, your person and your life, of your turning into what you know. All of your forms will be occupied with waves of change instead of being aligned to likes and dislikes. As awareness you’ll be aligned to knowing. When you’re aligned to knowing then it is meaning that you are. Being that that meaning is. With all of your forms being there to access it.

Jason: When you say forms do you mean forms of action or what exactly?

John: Form of your being, form of your self, form of your person, the form of your whole life all belonging to you. Meaning there will be no disagreement anywhere within with meaning and knowing.

Jason: When you use the word ‘knowledge’ do you mean something different from when you use the word “knowing’?

John: Knowledge is what meaning knowing has.

Jason: So when you speak of knowledge you’re speaking of self-knowledge, of my person?

John: Not of your person, not even of your self. Knowledge of that that’s deeper than both and it’s within you. As soon as what you first are moves, as soon as meaning moves you have real knowledge. You’re aware of it in your self and in your person. It doesn’t make any difference at all what you’re being. That knowledge within first is. Despite anything that you’re being in your self this knowledge within is. It doesn’t change. It isn’t subject to your self, it isn’t subject to anything that you’re being, it isn’t subject to your life, it isn’t for anything that you’ve been living for, it isn’t for anything that you’ve been living as, it simply is there within you. Your reaction to it or your separation from it doesn’t change it. This first knowledge within is incorruptible. You can cover it but you can’t alter it. It resonates clear through anything you put on top of it. This knowing is you. You are waiting for you to agree with you. The you that you’re accustomed to within your self is you as awareness- separate from that within that you first are- you separate from you. A split of awareness manifesting as a split in your heart. What you give your heart to isn’t the same as the deepest that you know the truth of in your heart. In your heart you’re holding out from you own heart, from your own deeper heart. The split continues into all of your self, within all of your person.

Jason: Thank you, John.

John: What are you going to do?

Jason: I’m going to agree with my self.

John: And that won’t be making meaningful decisions. It will be meaning making decisions. Your decisions as meaning will be uncharacteristic to what self you had. You will be that way. You’re entire self will change. The very patterning of your self won’t remain the same. You’ll be meaning that has a being. A meaning with being that has a self. A meaning-being-self in person moving through life, doing from within that that you first are. You won’t be governed anymore by emotions and will, feeling. Meaning-you, Meaning-knowing will be covering, integrating everything that you haven’t integrated yet. A massive clean, clear growing up of the innermost outwards manifesting an entire life. Being that which you are born for. Meaning the full, complete coming into you.

Jason: I see a flower opening.

John: It will petal your life instead of want and need doing so. You’ll be meeting every threshold in your self that you’ve been running away from. You’ll be healing every line within, every line of knowing that you’ve crossed. In a living way you’ll be healing yourself. You’ll be setting your self beautifully right.

Jason: I couldn’t have done it without you, John.

John: You’ll be as awareness, freeing yourself of bondage of unreason, freeing your self of the habitual misuse of reason. You’ll be freeing your self of the addiction to the misuse of reason. You’ll be setting your mind right. You’ll be thinking as reasonableness. You’ll be thinking with the sensitivity that love has. Your mind and your deep heart will be by you made to be congruent. Softness of heart with a sharp mind. Openness of heart with the will brought to one fine point, moved by meaning.

Jason: When you speak of the sharp mind I think of a sword, and I think of Christ saying that he brought the sword and not peace, and I think of how I’ve been a warrior for my whole adult life, until recently, when I felt it was time to put down my arms and surrender. Am I still a warrior?

(ten minute silence)

Jason: Thank you, John.

Saturday, April 03, 2010

What You Really Didn't Want to Know About Masturbation


When a person fantasizes about another person (sexually or not, and with or without auto-erotic stimulation), two things occur:

1) They begin to create an intent, the directed energy of desire, which, if persisted in, gives rise to a thought form or tulpa made up of the accumulated energy of that intent/desire. Whether or not they ever intend to act on their desire, the person is effectively creating a surrogate reality in which their fantasy can become real. The person fantasized about then becomes - potentially at least - an active threat to that surrogate reality, for obvious reasons (anything they do that contradicts it will cause the fake reality to tremble and collapse). This is seen so often in cases when stalkers end up murdering the object of their desires, as the only way to keep them "in line." Also, once a thought form is sufficiently energized, the original person who inspired it might well be seen as "expendable."

2) The second thing that occurs, actually inseparably from the first process described, is that the person fantasizing is sending out energy threads to the person fantasized about, so causing a degree of entanglement to occur - even if the object is totally oblivious to the fantasizer's existence (as in the case of movie stars and porn stars). A movie star has already in a sense put his or her energy "out there" and made it available to the whole world. In the terms of Castaneda, they have made themselves accessible, anytime, anywhere, and to anyone who cares to "have" them. This is the nature of fame, both the price and the reward at the same time. So when a person uses images of a star to fantasize about, they are actually absorbing a piece of the star's energy (through the image) into their own. The reason stars don't shrivel up and die in no time is, I suppose, that they are receiving even more energy (probably a lot more) than they are putting out there, coming from these fantasies, and form the relentless, obsessive, attention.

The point is, however, that the person indulging in fantasies about the movie star is not only creating a thought form that follows them around like a kite thereafter, they are also forging an invisible tie - an energy thread - to that star. So the energy pattern created includes all three "parties": subject, object, and thought form. Whatever energy the subject can suck off the star s/he puts into the thought form; but at the same time the star would be able to draw energy from the subject, through the thought form. The star would then grow to resonate more and more with the tulpas created in their image, as a god that gains power from worship and bloodshed. The fan would become ever more dependent on, enslaved to, the tulpa s/he had created and, more subtly, to the star s/he worships, as his/her reality becomes ever more centered around them. (In extreme cases, the obsession becomes active psychosis and the fan stalks the star: the best fictional enactment of this is in Scorsese's marvelous film, The King of Comedy)

The tulpa, in the meantime, would grow ever more substantial and autonomous until, potentially, it took on a life of its own (which may coincide with the fan becoming fully psychotic?). Potentially, many different thought forms, drawing upon the same fantasy object (e.g., Marilyn Monroe, James Dean), would eventually overlap and form an aggregate energy field, and so become veritable "gods" of the postmodern world. They would be animated, I suppose, by the unconscious of the countless fans who "worshiped" them (and by their many ideas about the celebrities being represented).

Saturday, March 27, 2010

Architects of the Imaginal: Movie Star Tulpas


Continuing this old discussion from last year at the inner forum:

Mountainsong commented:

I have noticed that my unconscious uses "stars" to represent certain archetypes in my dreams. One notable one for me is Gene Hackman. The first time I ever saw him was in Bite the Bullet where he protected a horse that was being beaten. He made the bully stop beating the horse and gave him a good thrashing in return...if I remember the movie right. Ever since then he occasionally appears in my dreams as a figure of protection. One time I dreamed that I was standing in front of a wall that was oozing blood because it had murdered people hidden behind it (a pretty good metaphor for repressed memories) and he was protecting me from the murderer who wanted to add me to the people behind the wall.
This seems a good example of something I’ve been trying to get at: the way movies create narratives—with characters embodied by stars—to colonize our unconscious. When we see a good movie, or at least one that affects us personally, we may continue to run through the images, dialogue, characters and situations in our mind for hours or even days afterwards. In a way, we continue to narrate—to live—the story, in and through our consciousness. Think of those people we know—or at least have seen in movies!—who are obsessed with a particular movie and who recite lines of dialogue compulsively. We may only be aware of this happening with certain movies, ones we see more than once and that we choose to make our own, movies that we internalize to such an extent that we feel a personal connection to them, to the actors and filmmakers, and perhaps most of all, to the characters within the story.

When a person dreams—literally or otherwise—of meeting a movie star, aren’t they really fantasizing about meeting the characters the star has played on the screen? Since we have little or no experience of the actor’s actual personality—except through bogus TV publicity, magazine interviews, and suchlike—it’s an inescapable but little remarked on fact that fans are primarily connecting to the characters an actor plays, and not to the actor who embodies them. These characters exist in ways imaginal not actual: first of all, they exist in the mind of the writer who creates them; secondly they exist through the methodology, the emotional, psychological and physical identification, of the actors; and finally, they come into being in the consciousness of the audience itself. Since these characters have no actual existence—save that embodied by an actor, who then sheds the character as a snake sheds a skin—whatever reality they possess pertains to the Imaginal realms, i.e., that of consciousness. In which case, these characters are every bit as real, and maybe potentially even far more so, in our thoughts, memories, and fantasies than they can ever be on the screen. This is the realm from which they emerged and to which they really belong: the realm of the imagination.

Movie characters are drawn from the imaginal pool of the collective consciousness, and to this pool they return. But there is a steady growth or replication process that is occurring. Any given character—let’s say Harry Potter, to use an obvious example—is apparently the product of a single imagination (in this case, J.K. Rowling). Circumstances ensure that said character enters into the collective imagination, through the standard (though rare) process of publication, movie deal, and so forth, until the character is known to just about every teenager on the planet, and even most adults too. What we have seen here is the process by which a single imagination has tapped into the collective and then, echoing this process, the collective taps into the imagination of a single individual. Harry Potter began his existence as a thought-form belonging to one person; he now “belongs” to—has access to—billions of people’s consciousness. All of these people’s imagination is now working with, on, and through the idea of Harry Potter, and through their own personal relationship to “him”—their investment in him (i.e., whatever he represents to them). The influence of Harry Potter on the minds and hearts of children and teenagers (and by extension adults also), then, is immeasurable—it far transcends the influence of a single writer/creator. It is not J.K Rowling, or even her books, that are influencing kids; it is kids’ own imaginative interaction with the narratives and characters that belong to the imaginal world of the Harry Potter books.

This is often described as fanaticism or obsession, a cult phenomenon, and suchlike. Think of Tolkien’s Lord of the Rings, and the degree to which fans have immersed themselves in the “culture”—the mythology—of these books, treating them not merely as if real, but as real. Such fanatical devotion to a set of narratives is like a game of make-believe that becomes as real as ordinary reality, and so ceases to be (merely) a game. When Walt Disney (perhaps the greatest single Tulpa-creator of the 20th century) coined the term “Imagineering”—in 1952—he was decades ahead of his time. The word is only now coming into its own, or rather, we are only now beginning to understand the necessity of such a word to account for the way in which our world, our reality, is created, or shaped, by the imagination, as directed and shaped by mass media. Architects of the Imaginal.


The inevitable question is: what are the effects of allowing these imagineered characters and narratives into our psyches? What is the result of our willing collaboration with the process by which these pop archetypes become active forces in our psyches, and ascend to mythic status? What happens when popular characters of fiction become icons to be observed, admired, emulated, and finally, worshipped—as gods?

In MS’s dream she describes how she created a tulpa, not of the actor Gene Hackman, but of a character played by Hackman (more or less), in some otherwise forgettable movie she saw years ago. We can assume that this thought-form is made up mostly of MS’s own psychic energy, that is, the emotional content, associations, fears, wishes, etc, which were originally invoked by the movie and/or which have built up (around this character and the actor who played him) ever since. So, although the thought-form is her own, having emerged from her unconscious to dialogue with her conscious mind, it has drawn in part its appearance, its flavor—even perhaps it’s intent—from a semi-fictional construct made actual through an actor’s performance. The Hackman (apropos name, since he has “hacked” into MS’s psyche!) tulpa potentially both informs her unconscious (providing symbolic content for it to play with) and draws energy off it. This last idea is key: archetypes (and tulpas are like small-fry archetypes) both feed our consciousness and feed off of it.

This is a difficult concept. There are very few existing models by which to understand these processes. We do not have a science of archetypes, much less of tulpa creation or of psycho-social engineering through mass-media! But it stands to reason that there must remain some connection, however subtle or discreet, between the thought-form visiting MS in her dreams and the original creation of the actor, writer and filmmakers, sourced in a movie MS saw years before. To go back to our first example: Harry Potter is the creation of J.K. Rowling’s imagination, and as such, he can never be entirely independent of it, any more than a human child can be fully separated from its genealogy, no matter how grown up and “independent” it may be.

Quantum mechanics has observed how atoms that interact become “entangled” forever after, creating a constant, instantaneous line of “sympathy” between them, meaning that whatever is done to one affects the other. So how much more so of two atoms that were once a single atom, as is the case with a mother and child, or a creator and thought-form? The basic understanding of quantum physics—and particularly of David Bohm’s holographic universe model—is more or less equivalent to the atavistic notion of sympathetic magik and of an animistic universe. From this view, all things are in relationship to one another and form part of a single web of consciousness. Likewise movies create little mini-realities within realities that are all interconnected, first of all by the actors and filmmakers, but then, of course, in the collective consciousness of the movie-going audience. The culture of movies and mass media forms an Imaginal (but also energetic) web of interconnectivity, an energetic grid which is laid on top of the primary “matrix” of human consciousness. Yet while all the strands of this web lead to the same center, they are not equal in and of themselves. As with any ordinary structure, the interweaving play of sound and light that is the “mass media consciousness grid” requires many key joints, pillars, hinges, and so forth—anything but a random unfolding, it is rather an elaborate, hierarchical infrastructure of power.

Tulpas are designed as archetypal resonators to communicate universal meanings. This is their primary function. But they have a secondary, equally vital (though somewhat more concealed) function, as “hunter-gatherers” and distributors of energy. They are sort of like psychic-magnetic fields hooked into the collective unconscious that siphon off the energy of individual consciousness in order, like vampires feeing on the blood of virgins, to energize and “immortalize” themselves. True archetypes return this vital energy to the Source (the Imaginal realm), for the creation of new forms of life, new expressions of consciousness. Manufactured archetypes—those that come from human agents and agencies, such as Harry Potter—are naturally loyal to their creators. They also return the energy to heir source, only in this case it is a localized, and even personal, source. If you are having difficulty with this concept, think about it in simple, material terms and you can observe a coarser version of this same process. Every time someone “invests” in the Harry Potter narrative by buying a book, audio book, DVD of the movies, or any of the countless items of merchandise connected to the whole franchise, a small percentage of that investment goes to the author, J.K Rowling. A larger slice then goes to the corporations—and the corporate employees—who have “handled” the material: the publishers, film companies, and suchlike. Following the money allows us to visualize the more discreet or refined process by which a tulpa draws off energy from the collective, and distributes it among the various agencies responsible for its creation.

This isn’t simply a matter of tulpas giving a little and taking a little in return. The taking—though generally parasitic—may not necessary be “bad,” any more than our paying money for a book or a movie in itself constitutes a loss or compromise on our part. (It depends whether we get our money’s worth, or most of all, whether we feel like we did.) Nor is the receiving of an imagineered a narrative into our consciousness necessarily advantageous to us. The two processes work hand in hand, as positive and negative poles in a magnetic flow: our investing in a narrative, and our consent to treat it as real and valid in our lives, allows the thought-forms to take hold of our consciousness, and there to transform them, for good or ill.

One primary agenda of paratainment narratives—Harry Potter is a good example here—is that they hijack energy that would potentially be used for our own empowerment or gnosis, redirecting it into surrogate forms of experience, namely, fantasies and wish-fulfillment. People pay to see life-affirming, “feel-good” movies and enjoy seeing “the triumph of the individual spirit against impossible odds.” Although we suspend our disbelief during such movies, and although the ostensible message of is that we, as individuals, can also triumph, that “we can accomplish anything we set out minds to if our hearts are pure,” what we are left with is an infantilized version of the heroic journey that has little or no bearing in our actual, daily lives. For two hours, we get lost in a wish-fulfillment dream-fantasy, at the end of which we must return to our regular lives, and face the fact that such fantasies cannot be applied to reality. So the time and energy that we might otherwise have invested—through our own “imagineering”—into self-transformation (and even good deeds)—has been “spent” on childish narratives that cannot in any way be acted out in the real world. In fact, the closest real-world equivalent of “lone individual triumphing against impossible odds through persistence and determination” is probably for us to become rich, successful, and adored by millions—in a word, movie stars! But this, we also know in our bones, can never be.